While the Devil tries to F*** me in the back of his car.
Hey, I even made this song lyric work. I'm feeling in a kind of NIN mood. Mostly because I am screwed.
Completly screwed.
And not in a fun way, I wish. I am screwed due to the fact that the union of bus drivers has decided that they are going to strike in 10 days. Time to find "alternate transportation" that I don't have. My brain keeps thinking about this, hopefully trying to find a solution, but I can't seem to.
I've done a pretty good job holding it together, even though it could mean not coming to work. Well, until someone asked if it was going to effect me and I tried to explain (oh my god, I spelled this esplain to begin with, I feel like Ricky Ricardo...Now, Lucy). For Christ's sake, I don't even have a license. I have a permit. If I could afford a car, there wouldn't be parking by the time I got to work.
If I could change my schedule and come in earlier, I couldn't take my kid to school. If my boyfriend couldn't get to my house to watch my child, all of my solutions are moot.
I could start paying ridiculous amounts on child care again, but they usually close by 6, and I get off at 7.
Since there is no solution and they might not even go through with it (it is supposed to happen in 10 days, so if I don't post, you know why), I am trying not to think about it.
However, it keeps twirling around in my head. I am trying damn hard to stop thinking about it, cause it only gets worse each time.
Already I am thinking I am going to be homeless with no job and a kid, all because of the bus. A lot of people think this is the death toll for the bus. That was one of the major reasons I really appreciated this town.
So, no I prolly won't end up homeless. I would move back in with my mother and have to kill my stepfather, but at least my child would have a home. And I would have to live in Wyoming. Goodbye all my friends. I can't be homeless with a kid. It was infinitely preferable to living with my mother when it was just me, but it is WAY more complicated than that now.
People tell me not to worry about it. Do they not know me? I am the incessant worrier. If anything can go wrong, I worry endlessly, and sometimes needlessly. I am sure I am just going way overboard on all this, because I am FREAKING out, but it all seems so plausible right now. I don't want to have to leave my friends, I don't want to not have a job. It is a hopeless feeling. Well, maybe more later, it is terribly busy here today, I am just hoping writing about it will stop all this needless worrying. Yeah, right.
Completly screwed.
And not in a fun way, I wish. I am screwed due to the fact that the union of bus drivers has decided that they are going to strike in 10 days. Time to find "alternate transportation" that I don't have. My brain keeps thinking about this, hopefully trying to find a solution, but I can't seem to.
I've done a pretty good job holding it together, even though it could mean not coming to work. Well, until someone asked if it was going to effect me and I tried to explain (oh my god, I spelled this esplain to begin with, I feel like Ricky Ricardo...Now, Lucy). For Christ's sake, I don't even have a license. I have a permit. If I could afford a car, there wouldn't be parking by the time I got to work.
If I could change my schedule and come in earlier, I couldn't take my kid to school. If my boyfriend couldn't get to my house to watch my child, all of my solutions are moot.
I could start paying ridiculous amounts on child care again, but they usually close by 6, and I get off at 7.
Since there is no solution and they might not even go through with it (it is supposed to happen in 10 days, so if I don't post, you know why), I am trying not to think about it.
However, it keeps twirling around in my head. I am trying damn hard to stop thinking about it, cause it only gets worse each time.
Already I am thinking I am going to be homeless with no job and a kid, all because of the bus. A lot of people think this is the death toll for the bus. That was one of the major reasons I really appreciated this town.
So, no I prolly won't end up homeless. I would move back in with my mother and have to kill my stepfather, but at least my child would have a home. And I would have to live in Wyoming. Goodbye all my friends. I can't be homeless with a kid. It was infinitely preferable to living with my mother when it was just me, but it is WAY more complicated than that now.
People tell me not to worry about it. Do they not know me? I am the incessant worrier. If anything can go wrong, I worry endlessly, and sometimes needlessly. I am sure I am just going way overboard on all this, because I am FREAKING out, but it all seems so plausible right now. I don't want to have to leave my friends, I don't want to not have a job. It is a hopeless feeling. Well, maybe more later, it is terribly busy here today, I am just hoping writing about it will stop all this needless worrying. Yeah, right.
Comments
I worry for fun, as a hobby... and I go *there* with worst-case scenarios and make contingency plans.
Hey, it's what I'm good at.
Question: do you qualify for state aid in childcare,
where do you work? and where are you near for housing?
hm.
going to have to email me/you.
uhhhhh........ cocoa_baer@yahoo.com
I *think* I may be able to come up with some solutions :)
If you want... unless um that'd be intrusive or tacky, which I am oblivious to.
Karina - LMAO. Maybe we really were seperated at birth. If so, you got the better deal.