I don’t even need this thing.
An ode to my procreational bits. I call it Tricky little bitch. I go pee. I wipe. I study the toilet paper like it’s a religious tome. Does it look slightly pink? Will it ever? Did I get magically, elderly uterus pregnant for Christmas? It IS 2020! On impulse I wipe again. Blood all over. Where the fuck was it hiding the first time?? Is she magic? Thanks for ruining New Year’s Eve uterus!