Random Thoughts

I keep thinking I should really tidy this up. I mean, I don't even know if any of my links work anymore. But the time? When do I have the time? Now don't get me wrong, I have plenty of free time lately, but it's hard to do anything from my iPod and if I am in the room with the computer, Ben follows me and/or gets on the computer first. I know, white people problems, huh? Friday I get to make yummy veggie laden dinner with Ariel and my old roommate Heather. Excited for that, but man Monday takes forever. Especially when it's the late shift. I'm trying to eat healthier, or at least start to incorporate more veggies in. I've already stated with fruits, eating apples and yogurt for breakfast semi-daily. And! It's almost my birthday. I tried, in vain, to hold it in. I haven't been telling people monthly, maybe I told Ben once or twice, but not that it's less than 3 weeks away, I'm practically bursting with excitement. Sounds like a day trip to...

One day off always throws me. It’s funny; it was the perfect weekend, even in its smallness. Gave me less time to get upset or over think anything. Friday night we cooked dinner together, Saturday was a road trip to Portland to drop off the kid and visit with my lovelies…. Saturday night was a movie and getting ready for the work week. So…I blocked this site a long time ago to anyone but people who I want to read it. For fear of sisters finding my dark nightmarish past….I don’t want anyone to accidentally learn about such things. But a part of me is sad that I can’t be as open anymore. I guess that’s what I get for sharing. I should’ve kept it all story format or something. Like…once upon a time and not…these are the true happenings of my life. I’d like to share with the world, but how to cut out a certain part of it for fear of hurting it? Can I just block Wyoming? Hahaha. It just makes me sad that something I started so many years ago has gone the way of so much else…and as I keep ad...

There was a Daddie's concert last Thursday. The day before my child's 12th (When the fuck did THAT happen?) birthday. It was weird, seeing as how there was a Daddie's concert the night AFTER he was born, and he was born on a Thursday. I didn't go that one. Thankfully actually. A bunch of my friends got arrested hanging out in the graveyard after hours. I would have likely been with them had I not been recovering from a C-section. And had I not had the kid on time. Or found a babysitter I would have been comfortable with as he was ONLY a day old. (Goddamn cafe world. I'm totally addicted and have to pause every 5 minutes to try and save my cheeseburgers. Gah!) But I digress. Heather and I had been planning this concert since I found out about it. We go together, to almost every one. At least on my part, I believe she's gone to a few without me. A couple weeks ago, she called and told me she had the tickets and that she was bringing her friend Tricia along. I was ...

Ok..so it's not a new thing, but it was new to me. Having the cast play out the movie in front of the big screen, that is. They knew all the call backs, they had lots of girls in skimpy underwear, they had an AWESOME Frank furter. Flaming, he was. I love them flaming. Sometimes I miss David. *sigh* Anyhow. I was a bit unprepared for all the nudity that was to occur. Not entirely sure how it fit in with the movie, but I will admit that I like boobs. (Not that I can admit that around certain people...so I had to be all.."gross, nudity" about it explaining it later.) And college girls have nice ones too. As I'm rounding 30, I find mine being a bit more saggy. =( I miss high, firmer ones. Not that mine aren't good, they are good, it'd just be nice if they sat a little higher. They called my attention to bits in the movie on screen that I hadn't even noticed before. And I got to dance with a transylvanian. She was cute. =) It was VERY late at night, on crazy ca...

Cricket sucks. Like I thought. Ben and I went down to Gateway today to hit the store. First problem? They were not open on Sunday as advertised on their website, but the store front redirected us into the mall. Yay, my favorite place /sarcasm. Once in there, it became some other problem like usual. This time the answer was that I could change the due date, but I'd need to pay two months, because I am not on a prepay account like everyone else. No, my account is so old that I'm on a post pay account. I pay for my services AFTER the month. Which confuses me, as I'm pretty sure I bought the phone and got the first month free, so how am I behind? It's so long ago, there is no way to prove it. This is the 3rd story I've gotten. Ben remarked as we were walking to KFC for lunch that while he KNEW they were stupid, he did not really understand the depths of their stupidity like I tried to explain last time. I KNEW they would not change the date, no matter what I did. I paid...

"I'm almost there when you turn and look at me." Oh Pink. You're SO cheeky. I know what she means by the other parts of the song, but I shall leave that out here. Instead I will just admit that I've bitten my tongue many times in an effort to stifle my mouth from screaming or saying things I shouldn't. I've gotten better at it as I get older. Censoring? Yes, but sometimes I need a censor. Heather and I had SO much fun at the game on Thursday. We ate hamburgers, had way too many free beers, and then left before the game started. It was quite fun. We headed to Good Times from there and got "Tic tacs". I dislike Red Bull, but those are yummy, I must admit. Then a beer, then we headed off to punch some guy in the face in Thurston. We didn't end up punching anyone in the face, but it was very entertaining the whole time. We didn't end up seeing the guy, but we did find out that what Heather heard was untrue, so no reason to punch him in the fa...

Like "You don't get to be king cause some tart threw a sword at you!" Which is completely wrong, it's really much longer and more complicated than that. Ben is gone. I've hit MySpace about 3 times now, I've looked at things I shouldn't on the internet, taken pictures of my cleavage, am in the process of making dinner, singing country music at the top of my lungs, writing a blog post, and I'm STILL bored. I'm trying to figure out if I want to watch TV when dinner is done. Probably. Maybe there will be something awesome and free on OnDemand. The whole two showers in one day thing? My skin is itchy, but everything else is good. My hair is back to soft, sweet smelling, and falling all over the place cause I can't be bothered to put it up. And the whole forgetting deodorant thing this morning wasn't as much of a catastrophe since I had to shower again. I may have smelled a bit like a man before I showered just from the minimal amount of outside ...

(hee, my boyfriend would be tickled at my blog subject line.) The cosmos aligned for my birthday... I'm pretty sure I already mentioned that, but I didn't really get into detail. So, let me explain myself. 1. No neighbors right now, as the place next store is vacant and ready to be rented out - no neighbor to annoy, and believe me, it's easy since I love to sit in the kitchen so much and the kitchen echos..plus it's the only wall I share with them. Poor planning there. Or not, cause it's probably a good thing that my bedroom isn't next to someone else's. *grin* 2. I've been making some pretty awesome friends at work this year. Friends who actually like to hang out outside of work, and are totally chill and not crazy. 3. Everyone mingled quite well. I'll admit I was nervous, I've tried to incorporate friends from one area with friends from another area before and it doesn't always work. Most of the time, I have one friend who doesn't come ...

This weekend has been pretty much kick ass. 1. Sidney's party was fantastic. The hill getting there kicked my ass. I wondered if I would really make it a few times. I'm more than a little pissed at myself that Ben handled it a lot better and he smokes every day, while I pretty much only socially smoke. Shows how out of shape I am. I should climb Willamette hill every damn day, people. It's a great work out. Coming down was interesting. Made it, even with gravity working against me, but different parts of my legs are sore than are usually since I don't usually walk down an incline like that. 2. Today at work was busy, went quickly and Ruby invited me out for some beers after work. She's leaving for Equador and Chile tomorrow for a month. I'm going to miss her, but at least she's not "leaving" leaving. Just taking an extra long vacation. We lost a lot of people this year. =( Going out was awesome, everyone is always so nice and I got to talk to Jen q...

I had a BALL. Not literally, of course. I met Heather at the liquor store downtown, we headed to Good Times to see Mike and have a beer or two. Then out to Heather's house to get ready. I got to play with her wiener dogs and Jager was competing with Ester for wiener dog who loves me most. He just kept laying on me, and showing me his belly. Then he would get this little gap tooth grin on his face when I would pet him. Jasper sat patiently in the middle of the room waiting for his ball. Or not so patiently at times, but he was trying. Then when given the ball, he barked ferociously at it when it would get away from him. He kept finding it, blind though he may be. We decided that we should eat something, so Heather bought us some cheeseburgers and we sat in front of Skinner's Butte park and ate. Watching the kids have fun. Saturday was truly a glorious day, perfect for ambling about outside. Which we did a bit of after parking Heather's car downtown. We sat on the mall for ab...

He assured me that we probably had photoshop on one of the non-labeled CDs. I've been through them all, and while I did find photos, a TON of Red Vs. Blue, and Clerks 2; I found no photoshop, and I'm too lazy to wait for it to download from a torrent, so no photo for you. I don't know how else to view this psd file right now. I tried renaming it, but that didn't work. Do you know what is an awesome song to belt out at the top of your lungs? Proud Mary. Am I getting really old or what? I do have other pictures, mostly random things, but that's only because I KNEW were the disc was for my camera to download the software. Then I went to upload pictures and realized that I had taken 38. I only felt like I'd taken maybe 10 or so. This was surely a sign of how drunk I was becoming at Sidney's party, cause not only did I take more photos than I thought, there were quite a few of me trying to get these guys out in the dark. In a row. Like I didn't understand wha...

Originally posted to MySpace on Thursday, April 17th __________________________________________________________________________ I'm better now. Again, thanks to all who gave me words of encouragement. Having Hole's Violet on repeat has helped a bunch too. It tends to remind me of Beavis and Butthead, when they get all excited cause they think the video title is Violent, and they go off about it. I may have to watch that later. I have it on DVD, I can if I want to. More on the music later, I thought I would do a fun little post about the angry music I've had blaring on my iPod to better help me deal with the frustration. I also sent my boss a LONG email explaining how I was feeling this week about the whole damn thing. I think she realizes how irritated I really am, how sad I am that people can't just be happy, and how angry I get when people have lots to bitch about, but no solutions to offer. I'm a solution kind of girl. If you tell me a problem, I will try to fix ...

But my cousin is rocking all over the place. We have great discussions via blog responses. LOL. I’m sorry I stopped responding. I have no real excuse, just busy and every time I get in front the computer (when Ben is not already there) I keep playing Doom. We’ll get over it, but for now we are being spectacular slackers and playing Doom like maniacs. He watches me play and tells me where to go. I gave up last night after the big pink guy got out of his cage and came after me. It’s good that I didn’t blog yesterday, I was full of piss and vinegar. Just totally pissed off. I’m still a bit annoyed. My appointment for my re-up on my birth control was canceled. Unfortunately, they did not have my work phone number and could not be bothered to leave a message with Ben. The only good thing that came from having to leave work early, riding the bus for an HOUR to get there, and then being turned away, was that I ran into Heather from my little three musketeers group of friends in high school. S...

I've been working since Sunday, and I am SO ready for the weekend. I even have plans Friday. And the whole day off to be lazy and get ready to go out. Tammi and Jenn and I are going for sushis, and then possible coffees, and maybe even dessert! The height of decadence! And I deserve it! LOL. Today is officially my Thursday and I've been working in Tara's room which means little distractions from others, and it's not any sort of big deal that I am lunching at "my" desk today. Cause it's not really my desk and no one can be worried that I'm supposed to be working, as I am totally isolated. I like the isolation occasionally, I know it can drive Tara crazy and I could see that. If I was FORCED to do it every day, I'd probably get sick of it too. Anyhow. YAY! I'm so happy that I'm almost at the end of my week. It's been crazy, late one day, early the next. Tomorrow I can somewhat sleep in and then come in and get check run done. Check run da...

Sidney and I had a date today for sushi. I was really worried about being late, so I left an hour early. It was only as I got downtown that I realized by doing this, I was going to have to sit somewhere and loiter while I waited for her. No problem, thought I. I'll sit by the fountain downtown and wait until it's about time to walk over to 5th street. Except Saturday Market was going on. Which usually involves at least one person I avoid like the plague. So no luck. Then I thought, well, I'll wait downtown and catch the Breeze. Except once I got downtown all plans and thoughts fled and all I wanted was to be AWAY from downtown. So I walked the extremely long way around. Still got there way early. I guess she did too, but neither of us knew the other was there. LOL. I got my favorite sushi, but for some reason it didn't taste as good. Either I'm growing out of that particular obsession, or else my sore throat is affecting my taste buds. I think it is, really. =( Oh w...

(completely o/t. Did you know that the song that goes with the above lyric is used in a Disney movie? What's funny is that it is called "Relating to a psychopath", but when she sings the line about her "manic-depressive state" they totally gloss over it. It's ok to be a psychopath, but NOT ok to be Manic Depressive. Thanks for the lesson Disney!) Last weekend was fantastic! I went straight from work Friday (and I was allowed, nee encouraged to leave work early last Friday) to Tammy's. The idea was that I was going to accost Ariel there, sadly things did not work out that way. Not sadly, I spent quite a bit of time just chit chatting with Miss Tammy. I even got to know some of her work buddies. (everyone knows mine, Tara, of course) They were all very nice to me and had that sense of humor that appeals to me. A very sweet baby made the whole thing that much more entertaining. Other people's babies are wonderful. I hung out long after the party was ove...

I love Mondays where I get to stay home. I stayed up late last night, and even got to sleep in this morning. Derek is in Portland. Jake and Karen came to get him Saturday. So I've got to sleep in for two mornings in a row. Sadly, there will be no more. I have to work, and so have to get up. I even have to work Saturday, which is when they are bringing him back. I can go out Friday, but not too late. I can't go out Saturday. That's the end to crazy fun-ness. All in all, it was a good weekend. Like I said, Jake and Karen came and got him Saturday. They were gone by noon. It was weird. Lily is about 9 months old now. She's very serious. Hard to get a smile out of that baby. But she did squawk a few times. I miss those little indignant squawks. She had one of Derek's toys and he was like..ick, she's slobbering on it and went and took it from her. She just looked at him and let out one of those squawks and then she was done. Just like...WTH? And then she was over it....

After my crazy ass watched the movie on Friday night, I got so little sleep that I felt like the "walking dead". But, when I woke up at 9:30 because of the kid, (I know, 9:30, I have the easiest kid on the world - who is also learning how to use the remote and turn on his own damn cartoons, this is unfortunate though, when we want him to turn it off, cause now he can turn it back on - We have had to confiscate the remote.) I knew that trying to nap on the couch while listening to those damn cartoons would be pointless. I will either have some weird ass dreams, or I will start thinking about those ghosts in my house again. So, instead I decided I needed a bath. Which was nice. I read my magazines and sat in my small ass tub. Who needs to have their full leg covered anyways? This all culminates in my quest for shaved legs. Right about when my legs start to fall asleep I think, ok, now is the time to shave them. Why now? Because I don't want to feel when I cut the hell outta...