I Wish We'd Never Met......

Well, I had yet another weird dream last night. This was not so much about me being a slut, as me being an idiot.

In my dream, he called and said to call. Then (in my dream), like now, I am at a loss. I have no idea what all this means. I didn't think I should call him, and I managed not to call him throughout the dream, but I thought about it the whole time, and am still thinking about it.

What the hell is wrong with me?
I am completely disgusted with this dream. For one, he doesn't even have my number, we have kind of managed to cut each other completely out of the other's life. Maybe I only miss him as a friend. I can hope anyway. He wouldn't be calling me anyway.

So, why can I not strike him from my subconscious?

Does anyone know a way to get someone out of your head so that you never think about them again?

I put so many feelings into my relationship with him, and I really got nothing in return. He is so obviously bad for me, and yet my head keeps throwing these thoughts out about him. It kind of brings to mind the Nine Inch Nails song, "The Perfect Drug".

I am doing well and relatively at peace with my life and my current relationship, so I repeat...What the hell is wrong with me?

I really wish I hadn't ever met him. At the very least, I wish we had never went there. Then maybe we would still be friends and I wouldn't be so damn obsessed. When does it end?
I've had obsessions before, and I've managed to throw them off and laugh now about them. They all seem pretty laughable, what is so different about this boy?

Will I ever stop tormenting myself over this?

Maybe I should burn all his pictures.

Comments

SWSNBN said…
What about the one where he is playing with my cute little kitty cat? I could cut him out of that one.
1:35 PM
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