Random Thoughts

Originally posted to MySpace May 20th, yesterday! YAY! --------------------------------------------------------------------- That's the only word that can describe my feelings right now. I have a post for later about how I was already kind of having a bad day over stupid things, and then something huge came down. The court still does not have the dismissal papers from the people who tried to sue me. The whole reason why I went this route is because I didn't want to have to worry anymore, and I don't have the money for a lawyer. Which is why I'm so damn worried about this.... I don't know if I was stupid to pay them, if I'm being screwed, if I should be asking for more. I'm completely at their mercy. Like usual, after seeing the attorney the one time (and boy did I get my money out of that, I felt like a question firing squad), I still have a ton of questions. More brought on by what's happening now. It's been 3 MONTHS, and I didn't push it becaus...

Originally posted to MySpace on May 15th, 2008 --------------------------------------------------- Or at least as much as I ever stop worrying. =( The kid's tooth part came out last night while I was brushing his teeth. Just popped right out. It may have to do with the basketball to the face that he gave himself, or maybe it was just getting looser and looser over time, or perhaps it was some sticky candy that he wasn't supposed to eat. All I know is last night at dinner he took a bite of a chicken nugget, got a weird look on his face and said his tooth felt weird. Then we brushed and it came out. =( We can't get into the dentist until tomorrow, he appears to be doing ok...it's just freaky. I kept him home from school and now I'm second guessing that. Perhaps he would have been fine? He's already trying to get out of doing his homework on time since I'm not sure I'm sending him to school tomorrow either. What a bunch of crap. I'm angry, scared, runni...

I feel like I have about a billion appointments all of the sudden. I have to go back to the doctor Friday, to check up on everything. I am feeling better, not 100 percent, but better. The headaches may not be able to be gotten rid of unfortunately. It still resides, though it's not a permanent thing, like if I forget about it and think about anything else it doesn't hurt. Mind over matter? Who really knows. All I know for sure is that I go back Friday, and hopefully they will have some better news. Or better pills. People seem shocked that no one has taken my blood yet. What's the big deal? I've only had blood drawn once and that was when I was pregnant, so I'm pretty used to doctors not taking my blood. What good is it anyways? Do sicknesses reside in blood? It felt like I was getting a cold or the flu, so what good does blood do? And if it is an allergy, then checking my blood won't help. Maybe I'll ask them to check my blood. Maybe I need glasses and that...

I hate everyone today. Apparently, Wednesday is the day when I lost it. Anyone start a poll to see when I finally lost my freaking mind after not having enough time off? If you guessed Wednesday, you win! What you win? I don't know. My subconscious threw that damn dream at me, and I am just fucking annoyed after all of that. I've been thinking about it all freaking morning. I'm almost at the end of this book that I am loving. I'm not sure if it's coloring my mood or not. It's so close to the end, and I'm rooting for these people, but all of the sudden, they are all divorced. NOT A SINGLE COUPLE MADE IT through the years. I'm totally pissed. I had such hope for at least one of the couples. I really don't want a book to be able to put me in such a bad mood. Perhaps it's flowing over from all my Grandma thoughts. I don't know why this has been such a bad year. Most of the time I don't even think of my Grandma. I guess most of the time I just...