Random Thoughts

I'm back from the doctor, all freshly birth control-ified. My BP is good, my weight appears to be stable. Meh. I'd like it to drop, but that's not my luck this time. My little reminder card said my depo was due on the 2nd. They scheduled me for the 3rd. Not a big deal, they always assure me I have a week after it's "due" before I need to freak out. Except I guess during that week, we should be using some other form of control, like condoms. Yeah. They didn't tell me that part. So the nurse, who first calls me by my middle name, tells me that the doctor wants to know if I've had unprotected sex since the 1st. (In my head, I think, that's what I get this shot for right? To protect me?) I think about it, and realize that I had Monday off and we may have gotten up to a little something something later on in the day just because we could. I say yes, she gets a look on her face and goes to talk to my doctor. Oh good, I think. The doctor (LOVE HER, mostly...

I feel like I have about a billion appointments all of the sudden. I have to go back to the doctor Friday, to check up on everything. I am feeling better, not 100 percent, but better. The headaches may not be able to be gotten rid of unfortunately. It still resides, though it's not a permanent thing, like if I forget about it and think about anything else it doesn't hurt. Mind over matter? Who really knows. All I know for sure is that I go back Friday, and hopefully they will have some better news. Or better pills. People seem shocked that no one has taken my blood yet. What's the big deal? I've only had blood drawn once and that was when I was pregnant, so I'm pretty used to doctors not taking my blood. What good is it anyways? Do sicknesses reside in blood? It felt like I was getting a cold or the flu, so what good does blood do? And if it is an allergy, then checking my blood won't help. Maybe I'll ask them to check my blood. Maybe I need glasses and that...

I've decided I'm shopping for my birthday. I'm gonna get pants, we're gonna eat at the food court. ANYWHERE where there is no waiter for Derek to bug. Maybe I'll even get to shop for something fun at Victoria's Secret, or one of the DVD places. Who knows. I don't. Then home to drink Peach rum straight out of the bottle (the yummiest stuff I've ever tasted) and maybe watch a horror movie. Try to stay up and keep my eyes open, that's for sure. It's almost here! To get to the magical day (ha), I have to get through tomorrow. Tomorrow, the day of suck. I have to go back to the doctor and get my next birth control shot. Basically, it goes like this. 1. I get there, I wait. 2. I wait more. 3. The receptionists start talking in Spanish, I am convinced they are talking about me. It's always all about me. LOL. 4. I wait some more, while the phones ring and they laugh about some story one of them just told in Spanish. ANSWER THE PHONE. GAH. 5. I get c...

I have no idea what I am doing for my birthday. Still. I don't like not having set plans. I didn't really know what I wanted to do, but most likely dinner at the Mission and then maybe Good Times. I don't know. Now Ariel's car is broken (broken cars suck, I'm sorry Ariel) so maybe plans have shifted. I can still go out for dinner, but since I am taking my kid, I'm not going anywhere with a wait-person. Maybe McDonalds. And maybe Ice Cream. The only problem with that is by the time I finish McDonald's, I will not have room for Ice Cream. I am pre-emptively sad for Ice Cream. Ben suggested Fred Meyer, but I want GOOD ice cream. Like Dairy Queen or Cold Stone. If we have no baby sitter, then no Good Times, but no biggie there. Derek leaves town the next weekend so I can go out and pretend it's my birthday. LOL. I suppose that it's good I don't have any set plans, just in case things go wrong? I'm just not a "fly by the seat of my pants...

I've avoided talking about this all week. My weight went up. That five pounds I lost last time? Gained that back, plus another pound. And it's fine to be happy with your body and all that, and I'm really trying not to obsess over a number, but this could affect my health. They went on and on about how my specific birth control can make you gain weight, can make you feel hungry when you're not, or that Depo puts on two pounds every year that you CAN'T LOSE. Which is bullshit. I mean, I already eat when I'm not necessarily hungry, obviously. But how can they track that? How can they say that it's definitely the birth control's fault? In August when I went in, I expressed my concern over my seeming senility and how I'd managed to forget to take the pill a little to often for my liking. They seemed to think that Depo was the way to go, even though I kept asking about an IUD. She didn't like that idea apparently. And I didn't care, as long as some...

I have an appointment tomorrow. My regular, shot in the ass, birth control appointment. Hurray for birth control, really! But they are just not my favorite appointments. I go in, I wait for what feels like hours, then they WEIGH ME. Which is my least favorite part and they know it. They're always like...well, we don't have to weigh you and I'm like...no, it's better that I know how much I weigh occasionally. Last visit, I'd lost 5 lbs. This visit? I don't know. I'm kinda worried about it. I NEVER seem to notice when I'm gaining weight. My pants are always worn a little loose, and so they rarely end up being tight to give away my weight gain. I just never know until I am actually weighed. I haven't been drinking as much water as I should be. Today I came in and strapped on the feed bag, as Tara calls it. I ate a small bag of cheetoes, and then turned around and ate a whole grab bag of Munchos. I think I am addicted to them. I bought some Friday, and I...