Ehh
I think part of my problem is that I keep thinking..Jesus, I'm 25!
I used to look at people who were that age and be like...wow, they have their shit together. They are really doing something. They are calm and together and so adult.
I'm not. I don't feel like it anyhow. I mean, maybe I have my shit together (some days that is REALLY debatable) but I don't feel like I'm really doing anything.
Working at a job with a bunch of people who I don't know, or don't like. Just going from day to day.
I'm definitely not calm. I don't feel like an adult.
Like missing my mom, what kind of adult misses their parents and just wishes somedays that I could have her to take care of me.
Not that she did a crack up job as a parent, but their were good times. And I always felt like I could tell her most things, not everything, but things that were really bugging me.
I'm just frustrated and lonely, I guess. But I can't seem to get that out with people.
I used to look at people who were that age and be like...wow, they have their shit together. They are really doing something. They are calm and together and so adult.
I'm not. I don't feel like it anyhow. I mean, maybe I have my shit together (some days that is REALLY debatable) but I don't feel like I'm really doing anything.
Working at a job with a bunch of people who I don't know, or don't like. Just going from day to day.
I'm definitely not calm. I don't feel like an adult.
Like missing my mom, what kind of adult misses their parents and just wishes somedays that I could have her to take care of me.
Not that she did a crack up job as a parent, but their were good times. And I always felt like I could tell her most things, not everything, but things that were really bugging me.
I'm just frustrated and lonely, I guess. But I can't seem to get that out with people.
Comments
I find myself longing for her advice, for her guidance...
for someone OTHER THAN ME to be a grownup.
And then I realize, she's never been a grownup and she's the one coming to me with their problems...
It's hard growing up, and harder to be alone, harder still to have no one to look to.
Des, I think you're doing just fine.
Now where's that hot Latino boy?!
I have this fear, Des -- a fear that you will find out just how NORMAL all of your desires and insecurities are, and because they're NORMAL, you will give them up and leave the rest of us here all alone ... heh heh. Go for it!
You rock, girl. You just don't know it yet. Now hug that Derek and get some sleep!
Well, that would be nice. I know that some things are normal, cause every so often I share something and someone's like....I know what you mean.
I just didn't know about the whole wanting mom thing.
Give it up? I don't know. I'm pretty full of myself. I'm not sure I could ever give this up and not have anyone reading my thoughts. =)
Karina, I have no idea where the latin boy is. And thank you very much. It is hard. I just don't know what to do on such days. :S