"Everybody Hates Me"
Originally posted on Wed. April 16, 2008
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"Why do you suppose that is?
Because I'm the son of the devil.
Uh huh, why else?"
LOL I <3 South Park and that song especially.
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Yesterday was bad.
I felt beat down every way I turned.
I understand that people are inclined to have their own opinions and that they should air their grievances, but not necessarily at me. I only do this or that, I don't run the show. Throwing your attitude at me is not going to make anything better or change, I don't have that kind of power.
It's the back biting ones who are the worst.
At least the forthright ones say it out loud, even if they do say it ALL THE TIME. The ones who aren't "really" complaining feel worse to me. Just a snide comment that leaves me wondering what the hell that meant for about a week.
It's awesome to work with all women. Mostly anyhow. All women accountants at that.
I have my own neurosis, I admit it. I hope that I also admit when I've stepped over the line, cause that happens sometimes too. Like yesterday I was so damn angry just because I didn't have mayo for my sandwich. This is really no one's fault but my own, but I stomped around and made angry eyebrows. Once I ate, I was better, but DAMN. It's not ok to let my hunger make me like that.
I thought I'd gotten better and more thick skinned about the scheduling gripes, but I haven't. That's the problem with asking for input. I DO want them to give me something that will help if they have a better idea about something, not to just complain about it without being helpful.
Then I got an exceedingly nasty letter from New York over an 11 dollar invoice that we PAID, but they didn't apply our payment correctly. So, they may CANCEL our account and send us to collections. For 11 dollars. I wish I were kidding. But then I realized of course, they are from New York and I'm pretty sure there is a "We hate Desiree" club in New York. Seems like it when I always seem to deal with the crankiest people from that area.
Add all that to the weather turning ugly, and my itchy skin flaring up, and you have a fantastic day. I mean, I was just starting to be cautiously optimistic about not wanting to claw my skin off and now this. Thanks weather. Thanks a lot.
Meh. Hell, I'm more than halfway through my week, I'm doing good really. I have Friday off for working Sunday, we even have plans to go to Sidney's moving out party. =) I hope the weather is more co-operative as she has a nice big backyard that I always see as the focus of the parties. Could be because I only seem to go out during the summer? lol.
Wish me luck in getting through the next two days.
Ps. I stopped and bought cigarettes yesterday. That's how bad it was.
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Edit - I'm having a bad day today too.
I'm about to just give up the scheduling. If I gave it to someone else, MAYBE then I would be appreciated. Too late, of course, but appreciation would be nice.
During Rush I took two late shifts, as did one other full timer, and no other full timers had to. Was it noticed? Not really. Was is appreciated? Doesn't feel like it.
I wrote a note to myself last night "Wouldn't it be funny if I just quit?". Ha ha. Not really, I need a job.
I could quit the scheduling part. Maybe then I wouldn't feel guilty for taking some time off that I asked for months ago. Maybe then I wouldn't have to screw myself so that I don't feel guilty or feel like I'm making others do things that I don't.
I work late almost every day. I put myself in shitty shifts and shitty coverage areas just so that others won't complain.
And other people are right. It doesn't do me a damn bit of good.
I'm STILL having a bad day. I'm so sick of having bad days.
_________________________________________________________________________
"Why do you suppose that is?
Because I'm the son of the devil.
Uh huh, why else?"
LOL I <3 South Park and that song especially.
-----------------------------------------------------------
Yesterday was bad.
I felt beat down every way I turned.
I understand that people are inclined to have their own opinions and that they should air their grievances, but not necessarily at me. I only do this or that, I don't run the show. Throwing your attitude at me is not going to make anything better or change, I don't have that kind of power.
It's the back biting ones who are the worst.
At least the forthright ones say it out loud, even if they do say it ALL THE TIME. The ones who aren't "really" complaining feel worse to me. Just a snide comment that leaves me wondering what the hell that meant for about a week.
It's awesome to work with all women. Mostly anyhow. All women accountants at that.
I have my own neurosis, I admit it. I hope that I also admit when I've stepped over the line, cause that happens sometimes too. Like yesterday I was so damn angry just because I didn't have mayo for my sandwich. This is really no one's fault but my own, but I stomped around and made angry eyebrows. Once I ate, I was better, but DAMN. It's not ok to let my hunger make me like that.
I thought I'd gotten better and more thick skinned about the scheduling gripes, but I haven't. That's the problem with asking for input. I DO want them to give me something that will help if they have a better idea about something, not to just complain about it without being helpful.
Then I got an exceedingly nasty letter from New York over an 11 dollar invoice that we PAID, but they didn't apply our payment correctly. So, they may CANCEL our account and send us to collections. For 11 dollars. I wish I were kidding. But then I realized of course, they are from New York and I'm pretty sure there is a "We hate Desiree" club in New York. Seems like it when I always seem to deal with the crankiest people from that area.
Add all that to the weather turning ugly, and my itchy skin flaring up, and you have a fantastic day. I mean, I was just starting to be cautiously optimistic about not wanting to claw my skin off and now this. Thanks weather. Thanks a lot.
Meh. Hell, I'm more than halfway through my week, I'm doing good really. I have Friday off for working Sunday, we even have plans to go to Sidney's moving out party. =) I hope the weather is more co-operative as she has a nice big backyard that I always see as the focus of the parties. Could be because I only seem to go out during the summer? lol.
Wish me luck in getting through the next two days.
Ps. I stopped and bought cigarettes yesterday. That's how bad it was.
---------------------------------------------------
Edit - I'm having a bad day today too.
I'm about to just give up the scheduling. If I gave it to someone else, MAYBE then I would be appreciated. Too late, of course, but appreciation would be nice.
During Rush I took two late shifts, as did one other full timer, and no other full timers had to. Was it noticed? Not really. Was is appreciated? Doesn't feel like it.
I wrote a note to myself last night "Wouldn't it be funny if I just quit?". Ha ha. Not really, I need a job.
I could quit the scheduling part. Maybe then I wouldn't feel guilty for taking some time off that I asked for months ago. Maybe then I wouldn't have to screw myself so that I don't feel guilty or feel like I'm making others do things that I don't.
I work late almost every day. I put myself in shitty shifts and shitty coverage areas just so that others won't complain.
And other people are right. It doesn't do me a damn bit of good.
I'm STILL having a bad day. I'm so sick of having bad days.
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