Strangeness

I was feeling super wobbly yesterday. My legs felt like I had drunk about 5 double rum and cokes, but I hadn't drank one. I kept going down the stairs with this wierd sense of fatalism..I am gonna fall down the stairs. I was a little shaky too. Maybe it had something to do with how fucking pissed off I was. I don't know.

Last night wasn't awful. Guy friend was super careful not to piss me off. (sure I am the crazy bitch in at least someone's mind) He brought over whiskey, which is prolly why my head was pounding this morning. I only had two weak drinks, but whatever. I must stick to my rum and cokes. And boyfriend decided that he should stay the night, with only minimal cajoling from me. I think that might be what made it bearable. I knew I would have time with him after J left, so it was ok.

I welcome pain apparently, because last night I figured I would ask the boy if he ever envies guy friend because he is single and doesn't have to deal with a crazy girlfriend. He, of course, said no. I persisted and asked if he was just saying that because he is supposed to. Again, he said no. I finally let it rest. I mean, really, if he was envious, he would dump my ass.
Plus he gets laid way more often the drunk guy friend. *grin*