Maybe, perhaps, who knows....

It's been almost a year since we moved into the new place. Don't think I shared the crazy landlord story. And it is a good, weird one. I will  certainly share it at some point.

Not today though.

SO. Things have been crazy. Derek "graduated" from middle school. I went in for my regular annual check up only to have my blood pressure go up and then I got screwed out of my birth control. I was put on a different one, which is fine. It's a bit less effective if I'm not using it perfectly, but I've been so good at this lately that I'm actually not too worried about it. Between Ben and I, we remember and having it be partially his responsibility makes me less worried that he'll think I did it on purpose if the worst case scenario did happen. Not that I want it to. Sheesh. Having a baby now would be ridiculous.

Mostly what this has meant has been a visit to my regular doctor, a still high bp reading, she wanted to throw me on medications right away, I asked her not to and also to write me a prescription for a gym membership so I can use my medical benefit card to pay for it. Though I'm kind of wondering if perhaps I should have asked for her to write me something for an elliptical trainer that I could have in my house. Seeing as how it would be there and I'd have to look at it every day, I might be more inclined to use it. I dunno. They did blood work at that appt to check cholesterol and diabetes and such, all of that is fine, but my liver enzymes are up. This is likely due to drinking IMO. I have maybe been imbibing a bit too frequently lately. Moving next to a liquor store and having neighbors to drink with has no doubt increased my usage. It used to be weekends mainly, but I do so like my rum. Plus I have a problem with knowing when to quit. Not that I get raging drunk every night, but more often than I used to. And it's not a raging drunk thing every time, but I do drink more than one drink each time.

What does this mean? Well they want to test for Hepatitis to make sure that's not why my liver enzymes are out of whack. It also means abstaining from alcohol until the text on Wednesday the 11th. So far, so good. Which does my mind a whole world of good. Coming from my background with my drug addict mother, I always wonder if I have the type of personality to be addicted. And while she isn't a drug addict anymore, she does still drink a lot. (One moment while I think how I would draw a "drink alot" - LOL)

But since it's been almost a week since my last drink and I'm not FREAKING out, I feel so much better. Plus, I'm saving money and I'll be a cheap drunk on my birthday. The downside is that Ben may be a cheap drunk as well so we will have to be careful. If I have to put myself to bed on my birthday, I will, no doubt, be raging pissed. Oh yeah..Ben is not drinking either. At first I was like...oh, that's cute...but then the neighbor mentioned how they had a deal and if he needed a shot, he just needed to knock. So it's not as cute knowing he had a backup plan all along.

I go for my test on Wednesday the 11th. I'm not even worried because I don't get prison tattoos. It's still a novelty for me not to worry though. My doctor prescribed me a blood pressure cuff to check my own bp and keep readings. I found out yesterday that my insurance won't cover it unless I'm in renal failure. Which is awesome....seeing as how I'll bet they'd cover the blood pressure meds no problem. I just don't want to take drugs if I don't have to and get whatever side effects from that. You know?

I haven't been to the gym yet, but I DID walk for over an hour with the neighbor last night and instead of just sending Ben to the store, I've been walking with him.

I will likely buy my own blood pressure cuff, but I'm thinking that my bp is going to be down anyhow. I'm not drinking, I'm trying to incorporate more veggies into my meals, and now with walking thrown in there. I mean...I feel good. My biggest issue is that I fall asleep earlier than I would if I were drinking. Which is how I started drinking every weekend. I didn't want to fall asleep at ten when Ben would be up later, plus I also really wanted something to occupy me when Ben went out on Friday nights. Boredom created drinking I guess.

Now don't get me wrong. I'm still going to drink, but I think I need some more limitations here. Like maybe I'm only allowed to drink Friday/Saturday and special occasions or something. No doubt I will find my niche. I mean, it's not like I wasn't drinking before this year, just not more than the weekends. And my bp was always fine before that.

All in all, I think this may be the kick in the pants I need to start being healthier, and if healthier equals weighing less, well that'll be an added bonus.

In other news, the boyfriend is driving me a bit crazy. My low self esteem is helping me to feel as if he doesn't think I'm cute. He's a man of few words so that doesn't help. But after more than a week without sex (no one hit me please), I am feeling the effects and starting to wonder if perhaps my doing all the chasing means he could care less if we have sex or not. Le sigh. Boys are stupid.