Well, it's almost been a month, so perhaps I should actually blog?
Not that I haven't been. I have, just the cheating whore kind of blogging on MySpace.
So now you get updates. Hopefully funny, but probably not as I am drunk and I have a bump in an area that is hurting me. Not my ass thankfully, no, a more delicate place.
I take that back. Can I please have an ass bump again?
I'm also going to do that thing where I put the oldest post at the bottom. Hah. Cause it's easiest for me. And I am drunk. Did I mention that? Plus I have to eat Hamburger Helper for dinner and it's sapped my will to live.
P.S. Today I did something that I may actually be a little ashamed of. I shall speak of it no more after this.
P.S.S. I was just re-reading some of my blogs, and I officially HATE my fucking bangs. They are ALWAYS in my face. I'm about to shave them off.
P.S.S.S. There you go. A whole month of blog entries, copied over from MySpace like the MySpace whore I am.
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August 30, 2008
Let me tell you something that only parenting has taught me.
The other day the child was playing in the front yard while I tried not to hyperventilate that he might run into the street. He's 10 for chrissakes, I must let him start doing things that scare the hell out of me at some point.
I said I was neurotic. I was not kidding.
The child asked me to come outside and look at something. My laziness and the fact that the child often finds things funny, weird, amusing, that I do NOT find the same led me to ask WHY I needed to move from right here in front of the computer.
And so the child showed me why.
Let me preface this discovery by telling you that my yard is full of crap. People like to throw trash in it (hooligan high school kids) and that the old lady who used to live here apparently thought that things like peach pits, chicken bones (I hope), and milk jug lids are fine to throw out in the yard to compost. I guess. I don't know what that old lady thought, I only know that after 5 years, I still find the most random shit when we do yard work.
But this discovery by Derek wins.
My child looked to me where I was trying not to have to go outside and just looking through the window and then picked up what I can only imagine is some kind of cutting implement. A KNIFE of some sorts. Not that I can get the goddamn thing to actually show the sharp part of it..I really have no idea what the hell it is, just that the end result was this...
I freaked out and had to run outside anyhow and THEN I had to tell him that you should never pick up anything that resembles a knife. You'd think he'd have known this by how much we freaked out when he picked up a (needle-less, thankfully) syringe from a street we were walking down.
But with children, I suppose you must ALWAYS be VERY, VERY specific.
Ten seconds ago, the child asked me to come look at something, so instead of being lazy, I did. And it was a cat clip from America's Funniest Animals that really wasn't very funny at all. This is the usual type to thing the kid wants to show you.
5 seconds after that, he asked Ben to come look at something. Ben is smarter than me, and so very precisely asked if it was a T.V. clip. Therefore being able to continue being lazy.
And the kid didn't touch any knives today, so hurray for that.
Now my life is ruined, cause I have to eat Hamburger Helper for dinner. Ick.
Remind of this next time I run out of ideas for grocery shopping.
--
"My heart is drenched in wine"
Last night I started an inane blog entry about my favorite lines from Eminem songs. Then I realized that it's not just Eminem who knows how to turn a phrase.
Though he's damn good at it. I'm hard pressed to pick a favorite, but let me try here.
"She swallowed my leg whole, like a f****** egg roll" (Yes, I appear to be censoring today) Or maybe "Just remember, when I bomb your set, I only cuss to make your mom upset." That's pretty funny too.
You want something substantial?
"Or for anyone who's ever been through shit in they lives, 'til they sit and they cry at night wishing they'd die, 'til they throw on a rap record and they sit they vibe. We're nothing to you, but we're the f****** s**t in they eyes."
Okay. Not grammatically correct, but songs rarely are right? Fergie doesn't even have to spell right.
Because I am bored, I am going to try and find a good lyric from every one of my top 40 songs according to iTunes.
"Crazy thoughts have quick wings."
I'm only at number 2, and I just can't. Some times I guess I merely really like songs for the beat. We're skipping number 2.
"Follow you home, you got your headphones on."
"I'm trying to let you hear me as I am"
"I need to make mistakes, just to learn who I am. I don't want to be so damn protected."
"6 pairs of kicks is my definition of 12 steps."
"More f***** up than your sister's tackle box, 3 am at 5 o clock"
"You spin me around, the earth is moving, but I can't feel the ground."
"Music is my death grip, my music is where I'd like you touch."
"Yeah, I got 12 cars and I'm a star." Oh Missy. You took over this song for me.
Ok, we're skipping this one too.
And the next one. Um, I have too much Britney on my top 40, shoot me.
"There's a woman inside of all of us, who never quite seems to get enough."
"I won't let sorrow hurt me, not like it's hurt me before."
"Maybe you're the reason why, love, I'm feeling butterflies."
"Ever since I heard that you got this little crush, I've passed your way and it's giving me a rush."
"In the drop top shades, in the summertime blazing, you wanna be my boyfriend."
"How well I remember, the look was in his eyes, stealing kisses from me on the sly."
"I see you looking at me, like I'm some kind of freak."
"I got a cute face, chubby waist, thick legs, in shape."
"I love the way you wind your body."
"When we play, you shake your ass."
"It's officially the biggest midget in the game. I dunno." LOL
"I here, when will you make your move?"
"It's not so easy, loving me, it gets so complicated, all the things you gotta be."
"But you always really knew, I just want to be with you."
"I know you've been waiting, but I've been out making babies."
"Jumped head first into the water, baptized away my sins."
"Lovers get wild, start flashing your money."
"The love bug crawls right back up and bites me and I'm back!"
"Save this recording because I'm never coming back home, baby I'm gone."
"All around the world, on the microphone he leave the booth smelling like Burberry cologne."
"But you wasn't answering my call, Miss Lady."
"Just a little something, something to remind you, enjoy you'll never get this close again."
"If I only could make a deal with God and get him to swap our places."
"Now my grandmama ain't the only girl calling me baby"
"Now every dog got it's day, needless to say."
"If you're in a hurry, you got to go know, back up off me."
"But the persistent beat, it sounded thin upon listening."
"Please just admit you're wrong, which will it be?"
And that's my lyrics, minus a few. Anyone even know what the hell I'm talking about anymore? Some of them are pretty obvious.
Anyhow. Guess if you'd like. Or share some lyrics with me, maybe I can find some new music that way. =)
Somehow Eminem does not make my top 40 just yet. I'm just not angry enough, I guess.
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TNT sucks!
First I catch the end of Pay It Forward, what a SUCK ending.
Now I can't seem to stop watching Enough, just to see the end where the abusive asshole gets payback.
IMDB is no help what so ever. The morons on the message boards just keep talking about how she murdered him (OH NOES) and she should rot in jail.
Coming from my point of view, I'd do whatever I needed to to protect my child, but abuse must be one of my "buttons".
Meh.
Here I am getting all worked up over a movie.
Beyond that. I'm feeling better. When life throws shit at you, you need to be prepared. And in all honesty, no matter how we handle what comes next, it's not like it's my kid's health, or any of our health. It's NOT THAT BAD, is I guess what I'm trying to say to myself. It could be a hell of a lot worse. The boys are playing magic, hopefully winning and I kind of enjoy my alone time. I practically pushed them out the door today. I just felt like I needed some me time. Time to watch stupid movies, I guess.
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August 29, 2008
I’ll just listen to Eminem and get more pissed off...it’ll be awesome.
I'm having a hell of a day. Sometimes I wonder if the world is just like...hey, she's bitching about petty bullshit like work, let's throw something real and hard at her.
"How am I supposed to be positive when I don't see shit positive?"
Oh Eminem. I agree today. Tomorrow I'll try to be fucking positive again but today I'm just not.
My problem is big, and I'm not going into details, cause it's not just my problem. I just hope this doesn't end up causing me to be resentful and say shit I don't really mean. I hope like hell that it doesn't mean the end of a damn good relationship, over shit we can't control.
Yes, I'm probably exaggerating. Often times I'll think maybe this will be the straw and then it really isn't. We've gotten through so much together, this will just have to be the same. One way or another. Or not, depending on how we choose to deal with this next hurdle that life has thrown at us.
Again, I'm being vague. But it's not really my problem to share. Instead I shall listen to Eminem and hope it doesn't make me into a raging bitch later. Heh.
The good news? Tammi and I are going to sushi next Friday. YAY SUSHI!
That's still so far off. I have to get to the damn doctor for my birth control shot on Wednesday too. Hurray.
And if you don't like my vagueness, here is something real I can share. WTF is up with McCain picking a woman VP? I feel like it's merely to draw the people who are like..well, it's a WOMAN. If not for president, at least for VP.
Politics in public..heh. How stupid of me. Let us see what happens now.
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August 28, 2008
Why I Like Cows....
I had a weird dream this morning.
A dog in the neighborhood came out of nowhere and bit me on the leg.
Random dog. No dog I've ever seen. But then, THEN, a COW showed up out of nowhere and scared the dog off.
Is that awesome or what? Cows in my subconcious.
In other news, I'm back to being hateful. I pretty much hate everyone at this point. Why do things have to be so complicated? Why do people change their mind so damn much? GRRR.
Is that all vague enough?
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August 23, 2008
Mission accomplished
The child is done. Root canal over. He seems fine, though they cautioned that he may have some tenderness and soreness for the next few days.
You think I can just feed him ice cream for that long? It's not like we have to worry about the excess calories on his skinny little body.
Another appointment for November (right before his birthday, yay!) to put a more permanent filling on. I suppose that they want to make sure he doesn't have problems with this treatment. And the tooth looks different again, so now every time I worriedly glance at it, I'm gonna be like..did it look like that before?
I am too neurotic to have children. I don't remember being this anxious when he was first born even.
A lesson to be learned? All the child has to say is that his tooth feels weird and I start freaking out.
Yay. The permanentness of screwing up your front tooth.
Only 8 more years before he is an adult, and then I get to stop worrying, right?
Ha. Yeah, I thought not.
--
Just a few more hours...
They've moved Derek's appt to 2 today. Cause they want to have enough time to finish it.
This did not help my anxiety, how fucking long does it take? They've set aside an hour, she said.
I'm still freaking out, but it's only inwardly. Ben always helps and he will be with me.
But I'm shaky as hell right now. Could be because I haven't eaten, but I think this visit today factors into it at least a little bit.
Mantra : 4 hours from now, it will probably be over.
I'll just keep repeating that to myself.
And then come home and drink tonight after it's all done. I don't even know if I should be feeding him some sort of liquid-y food or what.
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August 22, 2008
Better for letting myself freak out..
And, like I said, Ben is pretty much a calming influence. What I need to remember is that this is necessary. The dentist would not want to do this if it were not necessary. It's no different than getting him immunizations.
--
Worst mother of the year award goes to....me.
I just got done watching "The Messengers". Jenn had told me that the ending sucked and I agree.
SPOILER ALERT-
That means that the father killed his own kids. WTF dude? I was apprehensive from the beginning when I realized that a kid probably died, though they don't go into detail on that death thankfully.
I liked John Corbett, so I'm kind of pissed right now.
END SPOILER ALERT-
I could be just like him at this point.
My kid's root canal got moved to tomorrow instead of Monday. I was hoping not to have to take him in, and just let Ben deal with it.
Doesn't that suck? I'm full of animosity towards myself, but I'm just a big wimp.
If I could have a root canal done myself and save him from it, I would.
I just really have no idea what is going to happen. All I know is that it's probably going to suck for him, and I am stuck in the land of "Wishing this shit never happened:" If I could have one chance to go back in time I would go back to that day and prevent my child from breaking his tooth. And that says a lot, as I've had a fair amount of shitty things happen to me.
I am FREAKING out. Inwardly, of course, I don't want him to freak out.
But every time I mention root canal, people get this look on their face. And I've never had one, so I have no idea what it's going to be like. I was hoping it would just be done by the time I got home on Monday, and I would not have to sit in the dentist's office agonizing over what they are doing to my kid.
Part of me knows it has to be done. At this point, since he's knocked it off twice, it'll be better to have this done. It will mean that he won't have pain if it comes off again. At least I THINK that's what it will mean. No root to hurt, no pain, right?
I am actually beside myself. I wondered what the meant, but I think I'm there. Completely in the land of freaking out and bawling my head off while no one is here with me to see how much it freaks me out.
Granted, the child has dealt with the dentist shit thus far very well. He seems to forget the pain almost the second it's over. He's just wondering how many tokens the dentist will give him so he can exchange them for toys.
Maybe it'll all be for the better? Maybe now I can stop cringing inside when we eat dinner and I'm convinced that damn tooth is going to just come out?
Maybe I should stop freaking out this much, but I can't seem to help it.
At least it's all here, and not freaking out outside.
It's just that I have nothing to compare it to. I've never had a root canal, and everyone makes pained faces when I mention my kid has to have one.
Why is this freaking me out? I've dealt with immunizations, they were necessary. As is this procedure. And I suppose I should just be greatful that he never has to go to through labor, cause that's the worst pain I can think of.
Ben'll keep me grounded, he always does.
But since I'm at home, alone, watching scary movies, now seemed like the PERFECT time to have myself a pity party.
I made that kid with my own body, perfectly.
And now we get to deal with this. God forbid it had been a broken bone instead. Something that would heal?
That's probably the worst thing I could say.
Instead I should be thankful.
Thankful that he has the insurance.
Thankful that it wasn't worse.
Thankful that he likes his dentist.
Thankful that it's only teeth.
I don't feel very thankful right now. =(
Instead I'm just freaked. Obviously.
PS. I may also be laughing hysterically. I don't know what that constitutes exactly, but every time I think how Ben mentioned that he thought they were done with the root canal thing last time, that it was over, I laugh quite a bit. I wish it were over.
I guess at this point I can just be happy that by this time tomorrow, it should be over with, come hell or high water.
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August 18, 2008
"I’m going to attempt to drown myself"
Hah. Not really. But I had to throw an Eminem lyric in there somewhere.
Ben thinks that I look better without the bangs. I'm trying really hard to convince myself this is so, but I feel like I have a huge forehead.
Since I'm really only trying to impress him, I'm going to try and grow them out. Something I've not done since the 3rd grade, and it didn't last then.
I've been too lazy to cut them, even on vacation, so I just keep brushing them out of my face.
Maybe this will work. Maybe I'll hate it. I don't know. I guess I'll see.
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August 17, 2008
Since I’m on vacation, someone had to die.
Luckily, it was not anyone I know personally, but still suck.
I can't say that SP would have ever had Isaac Hayes back as chef, but it's pretty much a moot point now.
With Bernie Mac the day before, Ben and I kind of wondered who would be next since these things "happen in 3's".
No one that I heard about..and actually I think both these guys died BEFORE I was actually on vacation, so I think I'm in the clear. =)
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I’m a crochety old man..
Don't know when it happened, but somewhere along the way I've become one.
1. I HATE teenagers. Any teenagers I see in public anyhow. I'm sure I was just as loud, and just as full of vulgar words, but I still hate them now.
2. I've begun to obsessively check weather.com...especially the last three days and shriek "LIES, LIES, the internet says it is supposed to be 85 RIGHT now, and it is REALLY 90". This started slowly, as I used to merely check the weather channel in the morning to see how I should dress. Now it's gone into crazy.
3. I run around wondering who turned the damn heat on, WHEN THE WINDOW IS OPEN? My child, of course, but I've become that person.
Oh well. There are worse things I could be. =)
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August 15, 2008
While scary enough..
I don't think I much liked "Silent Hill".
I don't like it where children are deemed as evil...my theory is that children are not born evil merely made evil.
But blame that on a ridiculous amount of "I believe the children are our future" and having a young child.
I don't like movies that insinuate ill will on the part of a child.
Meh. I'm too sensitive, I know.
Now I'm watching the Aqua Teen movie and contemplating uploading fair pictures. Instead I shall probably procrastinate and watch the movie more.
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August 13, 2008
"Hey master shake, can I go swimming?"
I feel like I'm going through some sort of withdrawal. All I want is to be neck deep in cool water right now.
For hours. Alternatively, I could just put my feet in the Ocean..I can't go neck deep out there, even I am not that crazy.
I need a swimming pool. And a swimming suit, but I could make do with shorts for now.
Bar heading down to the river were there are probably a boat load of people on a day like today, I think I'm out of luck.
=(
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August 11, 2008
What in the hell am I gonna do with myself?
I do not work again until Tuesday the 19th.
It's pretty awesome right now...but I know that it'll go by fast. We're gonna go to the fair and pretty much just hang out and be lazy.
Well, some grocery shopping too. Lately Derek is eating everything, and I KNOW he got taller while staying with Jake and Karen for those 6 weeks.
So, he's always "starving". It's weird.
So we have to figure out which day we are going to the fair...I was pointing towards Thursday, but it would be cheaper if we go Friday at this point. Early-ish, as the boys would still like to go to Magic that night. I dunno. I like the look of the fair at night, I used to be able to just go outside my house and stare at it. I have a photo, probably even here on MySpace where Heather and I are standing in front of the ferris wheel from my house. Ferris wheels are big, so it was awesome to see it encircle Heather and my's photo.
Speaking of, Tammi has put up an old picture taken by me. I was all confused for a moment, cause it was my house, but I was not in the picture and then I realized that..duh, I took the picture..I seem to always be taking the pictures. Not so appreciative in front of one, but I do like running around taking pictures of others.
Anyhow. I wish I'd thought to pick up a new book, I've been itching to read some Greek mythology lately. It's been too long since I read anything about mythology.
Besides urban legends..but that's not really the same thing.
Oh well. Gone are the days when I could just borrow a book from the library I worked at anytime it came over the counter and I was impressed. I read A LOT of books while I worked the at the library at LCC. I read all of the "Wrinkle in Time" books...I'd already read the first one, so I guess I really only finished it, though I think the re-read the first one when I read them all.
Derek got partway into the third one, I'll have to nudge him that way again.
Hopefully it will be an awesome vacation. I don't know that I'll have much to share since vacations are traditionally boring around my house. Just the way I like it. Sitting around being lazy. =)
I have to end this with this..cause it's made me smile all day.
"Come get some ham!"
LOL!
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August 9, 2008
"Passion twists the soul"
I liked "Shutter". I turned off all the lights, and watched it in my bedroom with the sound up loud. All benefits of the boys leaving me my entire house to play in.
I got my shopping done, I got my movie watched, and it was good. I have one gripe...the ad for it gave away the end. They didn't reveal what had happened 'til the end, but I KNEW that he had done something wrong from the trailer.
Now I want to google "ghosts" and "Oregon". That would be awesome, and a great way to freak myself the hell out, which I'm SO good at already.
I'm kind of random today. Mainly I think because it's my day off this weekend, tomorrow is work. So I'm just kind of all over the place, no need to focus. Now I'm listening to Toby Lightman and marveling. I love her voice.
P.S. I'm sad whenever my "mob" apps tell me that I should invite Frank to be in my "mob". Frank can't join any mob anymore. =( I just can't bring myself to take him off my friends. It's too final. =S
P.P.S. Not that Frank would have joined my fake MySpace mob. He probably would have been irritated at the fakeness instead. =)
But it still makes me sad.
--
I always thought it was so cool..
I have lots of earrings. Ok, maybe not lots...but quite a few, and a lot of those are big, clunky, colorful earrings. The kind you can't miss. The only holes that do not have permanent jewelry (at least for now) are the bottom ones and I love wearing very long, dangly earrings. And sometimes big hoops, though not the really big ones I've seen around. I'd like a pair of those.
Long ago before I had so many ear piercings (back before I was 18, whoa!), I tried to make my one pair of holes as "cool looking" as I could. I used to mismatch a lot of the time just for the hell of it. Also, because people would have one earring but not the other, so I would always just take the one when they didn't want them. I had a long heavy snake with a fake ruby for an eye. Probably gold plated, and I'd love to wear that one earring. I can't tell you what I "matched" it with, I don't remember.
I still have earrings with no mates...or what that be earring?
Except I have more than one. Stupid grammar.
I don't mismatch much these days, except that Ben had one ruby earring, that I now have, and I used to wear it with a different post that was purple. Not as noticeably different. Not like long ago.
Add that to growing my bangs over one eye (which I'm not that far away from right now again...eek) and maybe we see how cool I REALLY was. lol!
I'm avoiding shopping by reminiscing. Ugh. Hate the shopping.
But at least I can wear my headphones and get in and out pretty quickly. I don't have to get a lot. It's the waiting for the bus that takes forever.
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August 8, 2008
The Cricket guy SCREWED me.
So, halfway through today I almost WISHED that I was attending court today, trying to get people to stop suing me.
Instead, I got to deal with morons, and audit. Why in the world do we do a voluntary audit?
Some of it is fun, I won't lie. I'm a big accounting dork, playing with Excel makes me happy. It's just that I kept thinking I needed to wait for other things to finish this one area, so I may have procrastinated a bit.
I suppose the general mood of the day should have warned me against heading to the Cricket store, but other things were going well. Jenn picked me up from work (always a treat) and I got to the store in about 1/3 of the time it would normally take, maybe even 1/4 of the time.
I took my number and waited for a thousand hours, went up to the kid behind the counter when it was my turn, explained EVERYTHING I wanted to accomplish in great detail, and I should have known changing the due date of the damn phone was going to be a problem when he was like..uh.
I paid off the bill amount left, paid to switch the phone over to a newer phone, and THEN,..pardon me, I still can't quite believe what happened next.
THEN the guy tells me that if I want to change my due date, I have to come in the NEXT month and pay the "bridge pay" and then INSTEAD of paying the bill, tell him I want a new account, and THEN it will be a new bill.
I interrupted him, and I think he thought I just wasn't getting it, but I was incredulous. Apparently, I just needed to NOT pay the rest of the bill today like I was TOLD last Saturday and instead ask for a new account. Not a new number, just a new account.
I actually asked him if we could just pretend I hadn't paid and deal with it, like perhaps go back in time a FEW MINUTES?
He merely laughed. I'm still incredulous. He had even listened to me explain myself, and then he was like..well, let's do this one step at a time and took the rest of the payment first, never explaining that I should not be paying it.
Apparently, Cricket is not like most other retail in this world, and CANNOT void a transaction.
I'm still too damn confused to be angry. Yet. I fully expect to try this AGAIN next month, and have the same fucking problem. Perhaps I should just get a new phone at $50 bucks (get the first month free, and it usually costs me 47), and have a new due date already.
I'm waiting until Ben gets back to talk it over with him, cause he is smart about stuff like this. I wish that he was there today, he would have been more vocal about his dissatisfaction. I don't know if the kid thought I wanted it specifically to be due the 6th or what. He was just like...yeah, come in on the 7th and ask for a new account.
????
Today is only the 8th, so it would have meant it was due the 7th, which would have also been fine.
And does this mean I lose any and all sway (which is really neglible with Cricket) that my almost 7 years old account holds? So far the only benefit I can see is that I get entered 12 times in the monthly contest. Oh noes!
At least Shari's was good. Besides the woman who thought that whole place was smoking friendly. Moron.
The mall was good too, I only wish that Lane Bryant cute tops were not 40 bucks. I just can't justify that shit. Maybe some other time I will be allowed to have a cute top. lol.
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August 5, 2008
This blows my mind. I had to make sure I wasn’t actually on LSD.
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August 3, 2008
Best weekend ever
I managed to get my phone stuff taken care of for the moment, I got to spend the majority of yesterday at Tammi's house, hanging out. My kid stayed the night there, and we got a surprise guest staying the night here, ARIEL.
I <3 Ariel, and I touched her belly over and over again. I remember that weird feeling of something inside you moving around.
We talked and talked. I really love having a girlfriend stay the night. Ben seemed surly, but I never did figure out why. Probably me being overly sensitive. Tammi had a lot of cool people at her house, and one exceptionally super cute 10 month old boy. He was full of smiles, and so very excited by all the people. What's funny was this his mom's middle name is my first name, and we're both Cancers.
One of those random coincidences.
All in all, a damn good weekend. Derek is exhausted today, if history serves me, he probably got up at about 6 in the morning, after giggling for hours into the night. He LOVES a sleep over. It's hard to begrudge him that, though he's certainly grumpy the next day. Today he's more of a mellow, slightly grumpy child, instead of a completely angry child.
No better time for it than the summer anyhow. =)
I get lasagna for dinner and I'm so very happy about, cause I LOVE lasagna.
I shall go now, and maybe tonight I'll upload pictures. Probably not, but maybe.
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August 1, 2008
I’m awesome.
I went to work today, managed to keep my cool around people who annoy me, closed up the office (ok, so I totally botched the first closing call. I got all confused), came home, changed, STILL managed to get back out the door to catch the next bus, hit the liquor store, walked to Winco from there (rapid fire), got the bit of groceries we needed, and THEN walked home from there cause the damn bus was going to take half an hour. There I was busting my ass, thinking I was shooting for a time, when I could have been leisurely. I think I've only just now dried from the sweat. Not my hair of course.
I ran into this Matthew guy while walking home. Luckily, he was going one way, I was going the other. Nice enough guy, but I'm pretty damn sure that he really has NO idea who I am. Oh, he thinks he knows me, and he does...kind of.
He thinks we went to high school together, which is a big no, cause I only knew him from downtown and he's a couple of years older than me. And he thinks I have two kids, and no matter how many times I tell him I only have the one, he asks me how my kids are doing.
It's like the reverse of that thing I used to do when I would say kids. And I did a lot..but I don't know why. Maybe cause I'm just a consummate mom and I like to "steal" other people's children for the night?
Meh.
So...it's weird when your pride is hurt not because someone doesn't remember you (which happens too often with me) but because someone remembers you wrong.
Why do the people I hate remember me, and I run into them all the time?
Stupid bus system. Stupid somewhat small town. I rarely run into someone I'd actually like to see. I guess all my friends drive.
I'm inordinately proud of myself for walking home. I really just wanted to sit at the bus stop, but I pushed myself, and I think I made it home in about 20 minutes. Very good, I think.
It's got to be at least a mile, and I pushed myself the whole way, cause it was boring and I didn't have anyone to walk, talk, and dawdle with. lol.
Just my headphones and me.
My headphones are awesome, by the way. I'm finding that I really enjoy NOT hearing anyone. Which could be dangerous, I have to be careful, that's for sure.
Ok, no 20 minutes entry here. I'm going to listen to my country music and maybe upload photos. And play Mafia Wars when my energy gets back up. I'm almost level 10. Sure, I have no life, but at least I walked and exercised today. The boys are gone, I can do what I want. And playing Mafia Wars is probably better than what I usually do. Ben mentioned that it might actually be an RPG, but I told him I didn't want to hear him, and that he was OBVIOUSLY QUITE WRONG.
=)
So now you get updates. Hopefully funny, but probably not as I am drunk and I have a bump in an area that is hurting me. Not my ass thankfully, no, a more delicate place.
I take that back. Can I please have an ass bump again?
I'm also going to do that thing where I put the oldest post at the bottom. Hah. Cause it's easiest for me. And I am drunk. Did I mention that? Plus I have to eat Hamburger Helper for dinner and it's sapped my will to live.
P.S. Today I did something that I may actually be a little ashamed of. I shall speak of it no more after this.
P.S.S. I was just re-reading some of my blogs, and I officially HATE my fucking bangs. They are ALWAYS in my face. I'm about to shave them off.
P.S.S.S. There you go. A whole month of blog entries, copied over from MySpace like the MySpace whore I am.
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August 30, 2008
Let me tell you something that only parenting has taught me.
The other day the child was playing in the front yard while I tried not to hyperventilate that he might run into the street. He's 10 for chrissakes, I must let him start doing things that scare the hell out of me at some point.
I said I was neurotic. I was not kidding.
The child asked me to come outside and look at something. My laziness and the fact that the child often finds things funny, weird, amusing, that I do NOT find the same led me to ask WHY I needed to move from right here in front of the computer.
And so the child showed me why.
Let me preface this discovery by telling you that my yard is full of crap. People like to throw trash in it (hooligan high school kids) and that the old lady who used to live here apparently thought that things like peach pits, chicken bones (I hope), and milk jug lids are fine to throw out in the yard to compost. I guess. I don't know what that old lady thought, I only know that after 5 years, I still find the most random shit when we do yard work.
But this discovery by Derek wins.
My child looked to me where I was trying not to have to go outside and just looking through the window and then picked up what I can only imagine is some kind of cutting implement. A KNIFE of some sorts. Not that I can get the goddamn thing to actually show the sharp part of it..I really have no idea what the hell it is, just that the end result was this...
I freaked out and had to run outside anyhow and THEN I had to tell him that you should never pick up anything that resembles a knife. You'd think he'd have known this by how much we freaked out when he picked up a (needle-less, thankfully) syringe from a street we were walking down.
But with children, I suppose you must ALWAYS be VERY, VERY specific.
Ten seconds ago, the child asked me to come look at something, so instead of being lazy, I did. And it was a cat clip from America's Funniest Animals that really wasn't very funny at all. This is the usual type to thing the kid wants to show you.
5 seconds after that, he asked Ben to come look at something. Ben is smarter than me, and so very precisely asked if it was a T.V. clip. Therefore being able to continue being lazy.
And the kid didn't touch any knives today, so hurray for that.
Now my life is ruined, cause I have to eat Hamburger Helper for dinner. Ick.
Remind of this next time I run out of ideas for grocery shopping.
--
"My heart is drenched in wine"
Last night I started an inane blog entry about my favorite lines from Eminem songs. Then I realized that it's not just Eminem who knows how to turn a phrase.
Though he's damn good at it. I'm hard pressed to pick a favorite, but let me try here.
"She swallowed my leg whole, like a f****** egg roll" (Yes, I appear to be censoring today) Or maybe "Just remember, when I bomb your set, I only cuss to make your mom upset." That's pretty funny too.
You want something substantial?
"Or for anyone who's ever been through shit in they lives, 'til they sit and they cry at night wishing they'd die, 'til they throw on a rap record and they sit they vibe. We're nothing to you, but we're the f****** s**t in they eyes."
Okay. Not grammatically correct, but songs rarely are right? Fergie doesn't even have to spell right.
Because I am bored, I am going to try and find a good lyric from every one of my top 40 songs according to iTunes.
"Crazy thoughts have quick wings."
I'm only at number 2, and I just can't. Some times I guess I merely really like songs for the beat. We're skipping number 2.
"Follow you home, you got your headphones on."
"I'm trying to let you hear me as I am"
"I need to make mistakes, just to learn who I am. I don't want to be so damn protected."
"6 pairs of kicks is my definition of 12 steps."
"More f***** up than your sister's tackle box, 3 am at 5 o clock"
"You spin me around, the earth is moving, but I can't feel the ground."
"Music is my death grip, my music is where I'd like you touch."
"Yeah, I got 12 cars and I'm a star." Oh Missy. You took over this song for me.
Ok, we're skipping this one too.
And the next one. Um, I have too much Britney on my top 40, shoot me.
"There's a woman inside of all of us, who never quite seems to get enough."
"I won't let sorrow hurt me, not like it's hurt me before."
"Maybe you're the reason why, love, I'm feeling butterflies."
"Ever since I heard that you got this little crush, I've passed your way and it's giving me a rush."
"In the drop top shades, in the summertime blazing, you wanna be my boyfriend."
"How well I remember, the look was in his eyes, stealing kisses from me on the sly."
"I see you looking at me, like I'm some kind of freak."
"I got a cute face, chubby waist, thick legs, in shape."
"I love the way you wind your body."
"When we play, you shake your ass."
"It's officially the biggest midget in the game. I dunno." LOL
"I here, when will you make your move?"
"It's not so easy, loving me, it gets so complicated, all the things you gotta be."
"But you always really knew, I just want to be with you."
"I know you've been waiting, but I've been out making babies."
"Jumped head first into the water, baptized away my sins."
"Lovers get wild, start flashing your money."
"The love bug crawls right back up and bites me and I'm back!"
"Save this recording because I'm never coming back home, baby I'm gone."
"All around the world, on the microphone he leave the booth smelling like Burberry cologne."
"But you wasn't answering my call, Miss Lady."
"Just a little something, something to remind you, enjoy you'll never get this close again."
"If I only could make a deal with God and get him to swap our places."
"Now my grandmama ain't the only girl calling me baby"
"Now every dog got it's day, needless to say."
"If you're in a hurry, you got to go know, back up off me."
"But the persistent beat, it sounded thin upon listening."
"Please just admit you're wrong, which will it be?"
And that's my lyrics, minus a few. Anyone even know what the hell I'm talking about anymore? Some of them are pretty obvious.
Anyhow. Guess if you'd like. Or share some lyrics with me, maybe I can find some new music that way. =)
Somehow Eminem does not make my top 40 just yet. I'm just not angry enough, I guess.
--
TNT sucks!
First I catch the end of Pay It Forward, what a SUCK ending.
Now I can't seem to stop watching Enough, just to see the end where the abusive asshole gets payback.
IMDB is no help what so ever. The morons on the message boards just keep talking about how she murdered him (OH NOES) and she should rot in jail.
Coming from my point of view, I'd do whatever I needed to to protect my child, but abuse must be one of my "buttons".
Meh.
Here I am getting all worked up over a movie.
Beyond that. I'm feeling better. When life throws shit at you, you need to be prepared. And in all honesty, no matter how we handle what comes next, it's not like it's my kid's health, or any of our health. It's NOT THAT BAD, is I guess what I'm trying to say to myself. It could be a hell of a lot worse. The boys are playing magic, hopefully winning and I kind of enjoy my alone time. I practically pushed them out the door today. I just felt like I needed some me time. Time to watch stupid movies, I guess.
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August 29, 2008
I’ll just listen to Eminem and get more pissed off...it’ll be awesome.
I'm having a hell of a day. Sometimes I wonder if the world is just like...hey, she's bitching about petty bullshit like work, let's throw something real and hard at her.
"How am I supposed to be positive when I don't see shit positive?"
Oh Eminem. I agree today. Tomorrow I'll try to be fucking positive again but today I'm just not.
My problem is big, and I'm not going into details, cause it's not just my problem. I just hope this doesn't end up causing me to be resentful and say shit I don't really mean. I hope like hell that it doesn't mean the end of a damn good relationship, over shit we can't control.
Yes, I'm probably exaggerating. Often times I'll think maybe this will be the straw and then it really isn't. We've gotten through so much together, this will just have to be the same. One way or another. Or not, depending on how we choose to deal with this next hurdle that life has thrown at us.
Again, I'm being vague. But it's not really my problem to share. Instead I shall listen to Eminem and hope it doesn't make me into a raging bitch later. Heh.
The good news? Tammi and I are going to sushi next Friday. YAY SUSHI!
That's still so far off. I have to get to the damn doctor for my birth control shot on Wednesday too. Hurray.
And if you don't like my vagueness, here is something real I can share. WTF is up with McCain picking a woman VP? I feel like it's merely to draw the people who are like..well, it's a WOMAN. If not for president, at least for VP.
Politics in public..heh. How stupid of me. Let us see what happens now.
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August 28, 2008
Why I Like Cows....
I had a weird dream this morning.
A dog in the neighborhood came out of nowhere and bit me on the leg.
Random dog. No dog I've ever seen. But then, THEN, a COW showed up out of nowhere and scared the dog off.
Is that awesome or what? Cows in my subconcious.
In other news, I'm back to being hateful. I pretty much hate everyone at this point. Why do things have to be so complicated? Why do people change their mind so damn much? GRRR.
Is that all vague enough?
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August 23, 2008
Mission accomplished
The child is done. Root canal over. He seems fine, though they cautioned that he may have some tenderness and soreness for the next few days.
You think I can just feed him ice cream for that long? It's not like we have to worry about the excess calories on his skinny little body.
Another appointment for November (right before his birthday, yay!) to put a more permanent filling on. I suppose that they want to make sure he doesn't have problems with this treatment. And the tooth looks different again, so now every time I worriedly glance at it, I'm gonna be like..did it look like that before?
I am too neurotic to have children. I don't remember being this anxious when he was first born even.
A lesson to be learned? All the child has to say is that his tooth feels weird and I start freaking out.
Yay. The permanentness of screwing up your front tooth.
Only 8 more years before he is an adult, and then I get to stop worrying, right?
Ha. Yeah, I thought not.
--
Just a few more hours...
They've moved Derek's appt to 2 today. Cause they want to have enough time to finish it.
This did not help my anxiety, how fucking long does it take? They've set aside an hour, she said.
I'm still freaking out, but it's only inwardly. Ben always helps and he will be with me.
But I'm shaky as hell right now. Could be because I haven't eaten, but I think this visit today factors into it at least a little bit.
Mantra : 4 hours from now, it will probably be over.
I'll just keep repeating that to myself.
And then come home and drink tonight after it's all done. I don't even know if I should be feeding him some sort of liquid-y food or what.
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August 22, 2008
Better for letting myself freak out..
And, like I said, Ben is pretty much a calming influence. What I need to remember is that this is necessary. The dentist would not want to do this if it were not necessary. It's no different than getting him immunizations.
--
Worst mother of the year award goes to....me.
I just got done watching "The Messengers". Jenn had told me that the ending sucked and I agree.
SPOILER ALERT-
That means that the father killed his own kids. WTF dude? I was apprehensive from the beginning when I realized that a kid probably died, though they don't go into detail on that death thankfully.
I liked John Corbett, so I'm kind of pissed right now.
END SPOILER ALERT-
I could be just like him at this point.
My kid's root canal got moved to tomorrow instead of Monday. I was hoping not to have to take him in, and just let Ben deal with it.
Doesn't that suck? I'm full of animosity towards myself, but I'm just a big wimp.
If I could have a root canal done myself and save him from it, I would.
I just really have no idea what is going to happen. All I know is that it's probably going to suck for him, and I am stuck in the land of "Wishing this shit never happened:" If I could have one chance to go back in time I would go back to that day and prevent my child from breaking his tooth. And that says a lot, as I've had a fair amount of shitty things happen to me.
I am FREAKING out. Inwardly, of course, I don't want him to freak out.
But every time I mention root canal, people get this look on their face. And I've never had one, so I have no idea what it's going to be like. I was hoping it would just be done by the time I got home on Monday, and I would not have to sit in the dentist's office agonizing over what they are doing to my kid.
Part of me knows it has to be done. At this point, since he's knocked it off twice, it'll be better to have this done. It will mean that he won't have pain if it comes off again. At least I THINK that's what it will mean. No root to hurt, no pain, right?
I am actually beside myself. I wondered what the meant, but I think I'm there. Completely in the land of freaking out and bawling my head off while no one is here with me to see how much it freaks me out.
Granted, the child has dealt with the dentist shit thus far very well. He seems to forget the pain almost the second it's over. He's just wondering how many tokens the dentist will give him so he can exchange them for toys.
Maybe it'll all be for the better? Maybe now I can stop cringing inside when we eat dinner and I'm convinced that damn tooth is going to just come out?
Maybe I should stop freaking out this much, but I can't seem to help it.
At least it's all here, and not freaking out outside.
It's just that I have nothing to compare it to. I've never had a root canal, and everyone makes pained faces when I mention my kid has to have one.
Why is this freaking me out? I've dealt with immunizations, they were necessary. As is this procedure. And I suppose I should just be greatful that he never has to go to through labor, cause that's the worst pain I can think of.
Ben'll keep me grounded, he always does.
But since I'm at home, alone, watching scary movies, now seemed like the PERFECT time to have myself a pity party.
I made that kid with my own body, perfectly.
And now we get to deal with this. God forbid it had been a broken bone instead. Something that would heal?
That's probably the worst thing I could say.
Instead I should be thankful.
Thankful that he has the insurance.
Thankful that it wasn't worse.
Thankful that he likes his dentist.
Thankful that it's only teeth.
I don't feel very thankful right now. =(
Instead I'm just freaked. Obviously.
PS. I may also be laughing hysterically. I don't know what that constitutes exactly, but every time I think how Ben mentioned that he thought they were done with the root canal thing last time, that it was over, I laugh quite a bit. I wish it were over.
I guess at this point I can just be happy that by this time tomorrow, it should be over with, come hell or high water.
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August 18, 2008
"I’m going to attempt to drown myself"
Hah. Not really. But I had to throw an Eminem lyric in there somewhere.
Ben thinks that I look better without the bangs. I'm trying really hard to convince myself this is so, but I feel like I have a huge forehead.
Since I'm really only trying to impress him, I'm going to try and grow them out. Something I've not done since the 3rd grade, and it didn't last then.
I've been too lazy to cut them, even on vacation, so I just keep brushing them out of my face.
Maybe this will work. Maybe I'll hate it. I don't know. I guess I'll see.
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August 17, 2008
Since I’m on vacation, someone had to die.
Luckily, it was not anyone I know personally, but still suck.
I can't say that SP would have ever had Isaac Hayes back as chef, but it's pretty much a moot point now.
With Bernie Mac the day before, Ben and I kind of wondered who would be next since these things "happen in 3's".
No one that I heard about..and actually I think both these guys died BEFORE I was actually on vacation, so I think I'm in the clear. =)
--
I’m a crochety old man..
Don't know when it happened, but somewhere along the way I've become one.
1. I HATE teenagers. Any teenagers I see in public anyhow. I'm sure I was just as loud, and just as full of vulgar words, but I still hate them now.
2. I've begun to obsessively check weather.com...especially the last three days and shriek "LIES, LIES, the internet says it is supposed to be 85 RIGHT now, and it is REALLY 90". This started slowly, as I used to merely check the weather channel in the morning to see how I should dress. Now it's gone into crazy.
3. I run around wondering who turned the damn heat on, WHEN THE WINDOW IS OPEN? My child, of course, but I've become that person.
Oh well. There are worse things I could be. =)
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August 15, 2008
While scary enough..
I don't think I much liked "Silent Hill".
I don't like it where children are deemed as evil...my theory is that children are not born evil merely made evil.
But blame that on a ridiculous amount of "I believe the children are our future" and having a young child.
I don't like movies that insinuate ill will on the part of a child.
Meh. I'm too sensitive, I know.
Now I'm watching the Aqua Teen movie and contemplating uploading fair pictures. Instead I shall probably procrastinate and watch the movie more.
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August 13, 2008
"Hey master shake, can I go swimming?"
I feel like I'm going through some sort of withdrawal. All I want is to be neck deep in cool water right now.
For hours. Alternatively, I could just put my feet in the Ocean..I can't go neck deep out there, even I am not that crazy.
I need a swimming pool. And a swimming suit, but I could make do with shorts for now.
Bar heading down to the river were there are probably a boat load of people on a day like today, I think I'm out of luck.
=(
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August 11, 2008
What in the hell am I gonna do with myself?
I do not work again until Tuesday the 19th.
It's pretty awesome right now...but I know that it'll go by fast. We're gonna go to the fair and pretty much just hang out and be lazy.
Well, some grocery shopping too. Lately Derek is eating everything, and I KNOW he got taller while staying with Jake and Karen for those 6 weeks.
So, he's always "starving". It's weird.
So we have to figure out which day we are going to the fair...I was pointing towards Thursday, but it would be cheaper if we go Friday at this point. Early-ish, as the boys would still like to go to Magic that night. I dunno. I like the look of the fair at night, I used to be able to just go outside my house and stare at it. I have a photo, probably even here on MySpace where Heather and I are standing in front of the ferris wheel from my house. Ferris wheels are big, so it was awesome to see it encircle Heather and my's photo.
Speaking of, Tammi has put up an old picture taken by me. I was all confused for a moment, cause it was my house, but I was not in the picture and then I realized that..duh, I took the picture..I seem to always be taking the pictures. Not so appreciative in front of one, but I do like running around taking pictures of others.
Anyhow. I wish I'd thought to pick up a new book, I've been itching to read some Greek mythology lately. It's been too long since I read anything about mythology.
Besides urban legends..but that's not really the same thing.
Oh well. Gone are the days when I could just borrow a book from the library I worked at anytime it came over the counter and I was impressed. I read A LOT of books while I worked the at the library at LCC. I read all of the "Wrinkle in Time" books...I'd already read the first one, so I guess I really only finished it, though I think the re-read the first one when I read them all.
Derek got partway into the third one, I'll have to nudge him that way again.
Hopefully it will be an awesome vacation. I don't know that I'll have much to share since vacations are traditionally boring around my house. Just the way I like it. Sitting around being lazy. =)
I have to end this with this..cause it's made me smile all day.
"Come get some ham!"
LOL!
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August 9, 2008
"Passion twists the soul"
I liked "Shutter". I turned off all the lights, and watched it in my bedroom with the sound up loud. All benefits of the boys leaving me my entire house to play in.
I got my shopping done, I got my movie watched, and it was good. I have one gripe...the ad for it gave away the end. They didn't reveal what had happened 'til the end, but I KNEW that he had done something wrong from the trailer.
Now I want to google "ghosts" and "Oregon". That would be awesome, and a great way to freak myself the hell out, which I'm SO good at already.
I'm kind of random today. Mainly I think because it's my day off this weekend, tomorrow is work. So I'm just kind of all over the place, no need to focus. Now I'm listening to Toby Lightman and marveling. I love her voice.
P.S. I'm sad whenever my "mob" apps tell me that I should invite Frank to be in my "mob". Frank can't join any mob anymore. =( I just can't bring myself to take him off my friends. It's too final. =S
P.P.S. Not that Frank would have joined my fake MySpace mob. He probably would have been irritated at the fakeness instead. =)
But it still makes me sad.
--
I always thought it was so cool..
I have lots of earrings. Ok, maybe not lots...but quite a few, and a lot of those are big, clunky, colorful earrings. The kind you can't miss. The only holes that do not have permanent jewelry (at least for now) are the bottom ones and I love wearing very long, dangly earrings. And sometimes big hoops, though not the really big ones I've seen around. I'd like a pair of those.
Long ago before I had so many ear piercings (back before I was 18, whoa!), I tried to make my one pair of holes as "cool looking" as I could. I used to mismatch a lot of the time just for the hell of it. Also, because people would have one earring but not the other, so I would always just take the one when they didn't want them. I had a long heavy snake with a fake ruby for an eye. Probably gold plated, and I'd love to wear that one earring. I can't tell you what I "matched" it with, I don't remember.
I still have earrings with no mates...or what that be earring?
Except I have more than one. Stupid grammar.
I don't mismatch much these days, except that Ben had one ruby earring, that I now have, and I used to wear it with a different post that was purple. Not as noticeably different. Not like long ago.
Add that to growing my bangs over one eye (which I'm not that far away from right now again...eek) and maybe we see how cool I REALLY was. lol!
I'm avoiding shopping by reminiscing. Ugh. Hate the shopping.
But at least I can wear my headphones and get in and out pretty quickly. I don't have to get a lot. It's the waiting for the bus that takes forever.
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August 8, 2008
The Cricket guy SCREWED me.
So, halfway through today I almost WISHED that I was attending court today, trying to get people to stop suing me.
Instead, I got to deal with morons, and audit. Why in the world do we do a voluntary audit?
Some of it is fun, I won't lie. I'm a big accounting dork, playing with Excel makes me happy. It's just that I kept thinking I needed to wait for other things to finish this one area, so I may have procrastinated a bit.
I suppose the general mood of the day should have warned me against heading to the Cricket store, but other things were going well. Jenn picked me up from work (always a treat) and I got to the store in about 1/3 of the time it would normally take, maybe even 1/4 of the time.
I took my number and waited for a thousand hours, went up to the kid behind the counter when it was my turn, explained EVERYTHING I wanted to accomplish in great detail, and I should have known changing the due date of the damn phone was going to be a problem when he was like..uh.
I paid off the bill amount left, paid to switch the phone over to a newer phone, and THEN,..pardon me, I still can't quite believe what happened next.
THEN the guy tells me that if I want to change my due date, I have to come in the NEXT month and pay the "bridge pay" and then INSTEAD of paying the bill, tell him I want a new account, and THEN it will be a new bill.
I interrupted him, and I think he thought I just wasn't getting it, but I was incredulous. Apparently, I just needed to NOT pay the rest of the bill today like I was TOLD last Saturday and instead ask for a new account. Not a new number, just a new account.
I actually asked him if we could just pretend I hadn't paid and deal with it, like perhaps go back in time a FEW MINUTES?
He merely laughed. I'm still incredulous. He had even listened to me explain myself, and then he was like..well, let's do this one step at a time and took the rest of the payment first, never explaining that I should not be paying it.
Apparently, Cricket is not like most other retail in this world, and CANNOT void a transaction.
I'm still too damn confused to be angry. Yet. I fully expect to try this AGAIN next month, and have the same fucking problem. Perhaps I should just get a new phone at $50 bucks (get the first month free, and it usually costs me 47), and have a new due date already.
I'm waiting until Ben gets back to talk it over with him, cause he is smart about stuff like this. I wish that he was there today, he would have been more vocal about his dissatisfaction. I don't know if the kid thought I wanted it specifically to be due the 6th or what. He was just like...yeah, come in on the 7th and ask for a new account.
????
Today is only the 8th, so it would have meant it was due the 7th, which would have also been fine.
And does this mean I lose any and all sway (which is really neglible with Cricket) that my almost 7 years old account holds? So far the only benefit I can see is that I get entered 12 times in the monthly contest. Oh noes!
At least Shari's was good. Besides the woman who thought that whole place was smoking friendly. Moron.
The mall was good too, I only wish that Lane Bryant cute tops were not 40 bucks. I just can't justify that shit. Maybe some other time I will be allowed to have a cute top. lol.
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August 5, 2008
This blows my mind. I had to make sure I wasn’t actually on LSD.
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August 3, 2008
Best weekend ever
I managed to get my phone stuff taken care of for the moment, I got to spend the majority of yesterday at Tammi's house, hanging out. My kid stayed the night there, and we got a surprise guest staying the night here, ARIEL.
I <3 Ariel, and I touched her belly over and over again. I remember that weird feeling of something inside you moving around.
We talked and talked. I really love having a girlfriend stay the night. Ben seemed surly, but I never did figure out why. Probably me being overly sensitive. Tammi had a lot of cool people at her house, and one exceptionally super cute 10 month old boy. He was full of smiles, and so very excited by all the people. What's funny was this his mom's middle name is my first name, and we're both Cancers.
One of those random coincidences.
All in all, a damn good weekend. Derek is exhausted today, if history serves me, he probably got up at about 6 in the morning, after giggling for hours into the night. He LOVES a sleep over. It's hard to begrudge him that, though he's certainly grumpy the next day. Today he's more of a mellow, slightly grumpy child, instead of a completely angry child.
No better time for it than the summer anyhow. =)
I get lasagna for dinner and I'm so very happy about, cause I LOVE lasagna.
I shall go now, and maybe tonight I'll upload pictures. Probably not, but maybe.
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August 1, 2008
I’m awesome.
I went to work today, managed to keep my cool around people who annoy me, closed up the office (ok, so I totally botched the first closing call. I got all confused), came home, changed, STILL managed to get back out the door to catch the next bus, hit the liquor store, walked to Winco from there (rapid fire), got the bit of groceries we needed, and THEN walked home from there cause the damn bus was going to take half an hour. There I was busting my ass, thinking I was shooting for a time, when I could have been leisurely. I think I've only just now dried from the sweat. Not my hair of course.
I ran into this Matthew guy while walking home. Luckily, he was going one way, I was going the other. Nice enough guy, but I'm pretty damn sure that he really has NO idea who I am. Oh, he thinks he knows me, and he does...kind of.
He thinks we went to high school together, which is a big no, cause I only knew him from downtown and he's a couple of years older than me. And he thinks I have two kids, and no matter how many times I tell him I only have the one, he asks me how my kids are doing.
It's like the reverse of that thing I used to do when I would say kids. And I did a lot..but I don't know why. Maybe cause I'm just a consummate mom and I like to "steal" other people's children for the night?
Meh.
So...it's weird when your pride is hurt not because someone doesn't remember you (which happens too often with me) but because someone remembers you wrong.
Why do the people I hate remember me, and I run into them all the time?
Stupid bus system. Stupid somewhat small town. I rarely run into someone I'd actually like to see. I guess all my friends drive.
I'm inordinately proud of myself for walking home. I really just wanted to sit at the bus stop, but I pushed myself, and I think I made it home in about 20 minutes. Very good, I think.
It's got to be at least a mile, and I pushed myself the whole way, cause it was boring and I didn't have anyone to walk, talk, and dawdle with. lol.
Just my headphones and me.
My headphones are awesome, by the way. I'm finding that I really enjoy NOT hearing anyone. Which could be dangerous, I have to be careful, that's for sure.
Ok, no 20 minutes entry here. I'm going to listen to my country music and maybe upload photos. And play Mafia Wars when my energy gets back up. I'm almost level 10. Sure, I have no life, but at least I walked and exercised today. The boys are gone, I can do what I want. And playing Mafia Wars is probably better than what I usually do. Ben mentioned that it might actually be an RPG, but I told him I didn't want to hear him, and that he was OBVIOUSLY QUITE WRONG.
=)
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